The Birth Of Blue Steele

Last weekend, a reader asked me, “Why is your pen name Blue Steele?”  Fair enough question. So I figured I should share the answer with all of you, rather than just reply to his email.

I remember the day like it was yesterday. What started out like any other Friday morning, ended up being much more, and will forever hold a spot in my heart.

I had people over my house after an exciting Thursday night out, and awoke to what looked like a scene from Saw II. The light was tinkering, bodies lay far and wide, and I heard a slow drip coming from the sink in the bathroom. Considering I couldn't be late for work, I had to wake everyone up and straighten up the house. While I was cleaning the prior night's mess, I found someone’s Viagra on the living room floor. And that, my friends, is when it all started.

Being the curious George that I am, you can bet your ass that I was going to take it.  But when?

I knew there was no need to waste that beautiful blue diamond on someone I already hooked up with. I also knew that I couldn't waste it on a jerk-off session. The timing had to 'feel’ right.  So I put her in my drawer and hoped for the best.

I went out that night and was a little more aggressive than usual, knowing I had her waiting in my drawer. And the risk paid off! Before I knew it, I was back home with a nice little lady. She asked to use the bathroom, and that’s when I sneaked off and bit the shit out of the Viagra.

Now, I know a lot of these pills are placebos that just fuck with the head and have little effect on the penis. But not Viagra!  Before I got back into the living room I felt the difference. The second we started hooking up, it was on!  Literally, I felt like I was 11 years old and sneaking off with my mother’s Fredrick's Of Hollywood catalogue all over again.

Now before I proceed, let me get this out of the way: I have no problem getting it up. But throw a couple of drinks in me, fast forward the clock to 4:00 am, and hurl a tight condom on my dick, and I usually have the same issue every other male does — I’m hard, but not as hard as I was when I was 11. But not that night! That chick could have hung dry meats from my shit and it wouldn’t have bent an inch.

And the sex? It was insanely unbelievable.  Sweaty, freaky, dirty, rough — you name it, we did it.

Being that I’m 20-something bachelor, the majority of my sexual experiences are one and ... done, no matter how good a woman is in bed. Fuck. Who am I kidding? I'm one and done 99.9% of the time. That’s why I think it’s important to make a good first and last impression in the bedroom.

To quote a good friend of mine “I’ve probably had sex with about 50 girls, but only had sex, like, 55 times.”  If you can relate to what my friend said, or just find this quote as funny as I do, you might want to pop a Viagra once and awhile.  Not only do the little blue pills make for an amazing sexual experience, but they're also great first/last impression pills.  Why not make first-time sex memorable? Make a statement! Besides, women talk, and if you leave a good taste in their vagina, there's a possibility they'll spread the word for you.

So, now that you know how I got my name, do me a favor and spread the good word! I have a feeling Viagra is going to read this post and use Blue Steele to help spread the knowledge to young adults all over the country.

Help me, help you!